My life is still a little crazy at this point, but every day it’s getting better and better. I’m just taking things slow and day by day. In the meantime, I know many of you have been craving some articles so I reached out to my good friend and Persuasion Expert, Rintu Basu. I’m sure most of you know Rintu as he is the author of the popular The Persuasion Skills Black Book which I highly recommend if you haven’t read it. If you ever had an interest in Language Patterns, NLP or Influence and Persuasion I can’t think of a better book or teacher.

Well I’ve talked your ear off enough so let me hand you off to Rintu and please enjoy this article. If you enjoy this article please leave a comment below and let Rintu know.

—Josh

Leading People to Yes

As you sit there reading this article on Pacing and Leading Patterns you might have already noticed the hundreds of applications where you can use this to create fantastic results. In this article we will look at an extremely covert but very powerful hypnotic persuasion pattern. We will explore the benefits of using it, where it comes from and how you can use it to create some powerful results of your own.

Imagine a hypnotic language pattern that just takes your client from where they currently are and gently leads them to exactly where you want them to go in such a covert way that you only realise that you have got to your destination once you have arrived. How good an idea is that?

Now, some hypnotists see this as a great hypnosis tool to use with clients. Good hypnotists see this is a great tool to use both in and out of a therapy room. The best hypnotists have this so ingrained in their language that they can’t help themselves and are continually using these patterns to create compelling results.

Are You Sitting Comfortably?

As you read this article you might notice that I sometimes have a strange sentence structure. Sometimes this is because I write very colloquially from the UK, sometimes it is because I have an original approach to grammar and sometimes it is because I am delivering language patterns. I’ve already thrown a few at you, have you noticed?

You might have noticed several of the patterns the first time round and you may have caught a few more when you scan through again, certainly by the end of this article you will know how to use Pace and Lead Patterns to take anyone from where they are to where you want them to go. That would be the time to reread and notice the pattern.

Stepping Out of the Hypnotherapist’s Office

One pattern hypnotherapists use a lot, because it is extremely powerful is what I call a Pace and Lead Pattern. You may use them yourself. A typical phrase might be; “As you sit in the chair, with your eyes closed, you feel more relaxed.”

Notice how in that statement, assuming this is a hypnotherapy client situation, the first two statements, sitting in a chair with eyes closed are completely verifiably true and correct. The third statement cannot be externally verified by the hypnotherapist but the client is being led to making it true. The hypnotherapist makes two completely true statements and then suggests something that they would like to be true as if it is. This is what I call a Pace and Lead statement.

The reason this works so very powerfully is because you build rapport with statements that are true. Most people are socialised to like similarity and familiarity so by pointing these out it feels as if we are in agreement. The lead for the third part is the point where now there is a common bond you can take your subject to a new place. Obviously doing this in short steps and repeating the cycle is more covert than making one huge jump, but feel free to explore the differing effects of this pattern.

The structure of the pattern is simply making two completely true statements and then leading to a statement that you would like to be true. So now you have seen an example and discovered the foundation of the pattern you are ready to see some of the whole range of applications this has.

We Discussed Your Needs, Discovered All the Benefits and Can Now Move on to Discuss Payment

The best sales people are all hypnotists. A particular brand of pacing and leading patterns were translated into sales training and given the name of Yes Sets. Here the sales person would get the prospect by asking closed questions where the answer was yes. The sales person would then finish with the question they wanted a yes response for knowing that if the prospect has already answered yes several times they are likely to say yes again. Here is a typical sort of sale pitch as an example:

• It was the green one you picked out wasn’t it?

• Are you happy with my explanation of how to use it? (Obviously only if you know they already are.)

• Do you want to pay the deposit now?

This is a simplistic example and having read it I expect you have got the idea of how you can expand the idea in different direction. Depending on the context you might just make statements; here is an example from a presenter to a group at the opening of a presentation:

• You are sat in this room

• Watching me speak about (X)

• And that means you are ready to learn more about (X)

Or you might give your subject the illusion of choice by asking questions. For example here is a coach summarising a coaching session with a client:

• We’ve sat and discussed your goals, are you happy with those goals?

• Then we went through the next steps to accelerate your progress, can you see those steps clearly?

• And finally we made sure you have the motivation and commitment to follow this through. Can you still imagine how great you will feel when you have achieved all of this?

Read, Understand and Apply Accelerated Learning and Hypnotic Language Patterns

Now that you have read this article and seen a few examples you will want to know how to apply this yourself. Let us discuss a process to allow you to integrate this pattern into your normal everyday language.

The first thing I would like you to do is scan through the article again and notice how many times I have cycled you through this pattern. You have probably caught me several times just as you were reading through but I bet I have slipped this pattern past you a couple more times than you were expecting. I think this is a good thing to do because it gives you more knowledge of the pattern, how it works and how easy it is to slip past people.

The next thing I would like you to do is start practicing this pattern in conversations where the outcome doesn’t matter. Many people have a problem remembering to use patterns when in the middle of a conversation. This is why I suggest you do things the other way round and start having conversations specifically to use patterns.

You can turn the whole thing into a game. I often, just for the practice go into a conversation just using pace and lead patterns. The idea is when it is your turn to speak you have to say two truisms before you make the point you want to make. For example if I am having a conversation and a friend asks me what I did last night I might respond with something like, “Sat in here talking to you about last night makes me think I should get out more all I did last night was watch TV. I’ve just admitted I need to get out more and told you all I did was watch TV so I guess you were doing something exciting. What were you doing last night?”

Notice how I cycled through pacing and leading statements twice, once to answer the question and once to ask the next question. You are possibly thinking that this this would be a stilted conversation, people might notice because it is a bit odd or that you might stumble over your words. The short answer is I completely agree and that is why you go out and practice with people that you are comfortable with and in conversations where the outcome doesn’t matter.

Here are a couple of other practice opportunities. Obviously the best way to get started is to have a study buddy so you can learn together. Another way might be just to pick people you are comfortable with, like a partner or family member and just practice with them. I know some coaches and therapists that will say to a client at the beginning or end of sessions that they are trying out a few language patterns and practice on them. But for me the best way to practice is to just deliberately go into a conversation with the express intention of continually using the pattern until they notice and scream at you to stop. In the NLP Techniques of my website you will find more articles about Hypnotic Language Patterns and how to practice them until you are completely proficient.

Finally once you are comfortable with making Pacing and Leading statements start practicing having a defined objective as the lead part of the statement. You will notice as you start to play with the concept that you will find yourself using this pattern more and more almost to the point where you are just doing it instinctively.

Okay, Now I’ve Seen It and Done It How do I Find Out More?

My name is Rintu Basu and I am the author of the internationally bestselling Persuasion Skills Black Book. I have a range of courses and a huge amount of free material about Persuasion Skills and Hypnotic Language Patterns. You can find out more at the NLP Company Website or connect with me on the Facebook page for The Persuasion Skills Black Book and on Twitter @PersuasionTips

The other day I was catching up with an old friend from a long time back, who was raving about Transactional Analysis (TA. He’d just recently trained in it and he didn’t know how deeply involved with hypnosis I am (that’s how old a friend he is!). Every time I mentioned any kind of problem, or even anything about members of my family or friends, out it would come. “Ah!” he’d say knowingly. “They were in parent mode, rather than adult mode you see…” and off he’d go again.

Now I find the theory behind Transactional Analysis as interesting as the next person, maybe more so because I’m fascinated by any approach to human psychology, how our brains work, and anything that tries to explain the human condition. But the problem for me was that he was saying TA was the answer to absolutely everything. No other form of psychology or therapy or philosophy was given the time of day, and would have been regarded as inferior by him anyway. He was so over the top about it that I started to use my “relax and stay calm” anchor to prevent me from actually throwing him out the nearest window! (OK, that’s an exaggeration – but you get the idea!)

Hypnosis Isn’t The Only Game In Town

In my experience it’s a common problem though. Many therapists train in a particular discipline. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy’s particularly popular today and well regarded in medical circles. But there are all sorts of other mind-therapies too, most of them perfectly respectable and extremely useful; Jungian psycho-analysis; Rogerian therapy; NLP; Time Line Therapy; Gestalt therapy; Life Coaching; even Freud’s psychodynamic therapy still has its place… I could go on, and on.

My point is that people who train in each of these therapies often come to the conclusion that their particular therapy is the be all and end all – the answer to everything. But the human race is made up of individuals. What if you go and see a Gestalt therapist, and it just doesn’t seem to work for you? Or maybe you just don’t like the philosophy and approach? You probably just don’t go back. Or if you’re determined to sort something out, maybe you’ll go and find a different therapist.

Personally I think the best therapists I’ve seen in action are those that have trained in several different disciplines and can offer a range of approaches. They should be able to gauge what will most likely work for you, and use a mixture of approaches and techniques tailored to you as an individual. I know there’s still a place for specialists who have trained for years and become real experts in a particular field, to a level that a “Jack of all trades” couldn’t hope to master. And a good all round therapist should be able to recognize when a client could do with that level of specialism and refer them on. That’s what I think anyway. I know there’ll be some of you out there that probably disagree with me on this – hey it’s a free world.

But where does hypnosis fit in with this? Are we hypnotists just as bad, declaring that hypnosis is the way forward for absolutely everyone? Maybe some of us are. I know I’m sometimes guilty of evangelizing about hypnosis to the point of boring the pants off someone if I’m not careful, but the way I see it, there’s one big difference between hypnosis and a lot of the therapy approaches available out there. And that’s the fact that hypnosis isn’t a philosophy or a mode of thought, or an approach to the human condition – IT’S A TOOL.

That’s all. It’s a mighty powerful tool, but it’s still just a tool. And what’s fantastic is that it’s such a versatile tool it can be used to enhance virtually every therapeutic process out there. It can make so many psychotherapies much more powerful, more effective and work so much faster.

Enhancing Other Modalities with Hypnosis

So in a way, maybe I am saying hypnosis is the answer to everything! I firmly believe that if all therapists (dare I say all health professionals?) were trained to use hypnosis effectively, every single form of therapy would be hugely enhanced, to say nothing of much better value for money!

Hey – maybe I’m just as bad as that old friend of mine. Am I annoying you yet? The difference (I hope) is that I’m not saying that hypnosis is better than other forms of therapy. I respect most kinds of therapy on offer out there, and I think there’s a whole army of people doing a great job. I’d just love them all to be able to do it even better with this amazing tool that we call hypnosis. And to be fair, as hypnotists I think we could probably all benefit from some training in some carefully selected psycho-therapeutic approaches, allowing us to offer a deeper level of support and understanding to our clients when it’s appropriate.

So maybe what I’m saying is “Hypnosis – not the answer to everything, but part of the answer to everything!” What do you think? I’d love to hear your thoughts on the subject.

Pattern Interrupt is an NLP term for a technique that’s widely used in hypnosis. It’s a very effective tool for breaking unwanted habits. It’s also a really quick and efficient way of getting clients into an open and accessible frame of mind, so it can save you a load of time in your hypnosis sessions! Let’s begin by looking at the more easily understood concept of using Pattern Interrupt as a therapeutic intervention…

Using A Pattern Interrupt To Change Unwanted Behaviors

Unwanted behaviors almost all stem from a habit that’s become unconscious, automatic behavior. That’s why it’s difficult for people to break those habits. They discover they’ve eaten that biscuit or lit-up that cigarette without even noticing. They may have woken up that morning and decided quite consciously they were not going to smoke that day, but their unconscious, not their conscious mind runs automatic functions. The habit, or pattern, is so ingrained, that it happens anyway, and the client feels they have little control over it.

One way to break unwanted habits is to interrupt the automatic process involved.

Let’s take the smoking example. There are some very simple, small steps that can be taken to interrupt the automatic pattern of smoking. For example, just putting the packet of cigarettes in an unusual and less accessible place can help. When the unconscious mind triggers the automatic action of reaching for the cigarettes, they’re not there. This interrupts the normal pattern of picking up and lighting a cigarette. The moment of confusion caused by the packet not being in its normal place causes the conscious mind to kick in. Now the client must make a conscious decision to go and get the cigarettes or to stick with their resolve not to smoke. The important thing is the automatic pattern has not been allowed to play out as normal.

Of course I’m not suggesting that this on its own will break a long standing smoking habit (wouldn’t it be great if just sticking the cigarettes in the fridge or on the top of the wardrobe was all that we needed to do?!), but it’s one tool that can help.

This “catching yourself” mid-action, is frequently planted as a post hypnotic suggestion for gradually reducing an unwanted behavior, e.g.

“You’ll find that more and more often, as you go to light a cigarette, you’ll stop and think, “Do I really want to smoke this cigarette?” And more and more often you’ll realize that the answer is , “No.” It’s just habit that made you pick up the packet, and you’ll choose, more and more frequently to put the cigarette back in the packet unsmoked. And that will feel good. And every time you stop, and choose not to smoke, or every time you notice half-way through smoking a cigarette, and choose to put it out, you’ll know that you’re getting closer and closer to the day that you will be a non-smoker…”

And if at the point of interruption a different, unusual or healthier action is consciously put in place (e.g. pulling a ridiculous face or yelling, “I’m a non-smoker!”, or drinking a glass of water) that new action will gradually be incorporated into the automatic action, making the unwanted behavior even less likely to follow. The pattern has been permanently interrupted.

Pattern Interrupt for Hypnotists

That probably all seems straightforward and easy to understand. But Pattern Interrupt can be far, far more powerful. When an automatic process is interrupted, especially when it’s unexpected, it throws the mind into a brief period of confusion, and that moment of confusion is like gold dust to a hypnotist. The unconscious mind is in control during automatic behaviors, so when these behaviors are interrupted, the unconscious mind is there, exposed, confused, accessible and looking for direction. If we as hypnotists step in quickly and confidently to give that direction, the subject will often follow suggestions very quickly and easily.

One of the best known examples is the handshake induction. You offer your hand to the subject as though about to shake hands. The subject automatically responds, but instead of grasping the hand normally, the hypnotist grasps the subject’s wrist lightly with his left hand, raises it in front of the subject and tells them to look at a point on their own palm… this may sound very blatant, but because an automatic function (shaking hands) is being suddenly and smoothly interrupted, the mind is tipped into momentary confusion and very open to suggestion. It’s important to keep talking until the client is clearly in deep trance. This prevents the conscious mind from stepping in and re-orienting the subject. You can quickly follow up with suggestions of trance, deepening and therapeutic intervention.

It takes confidence, and has to be done quickly and calmly, but look for those moments of confusion and make the most of them. You’ll save yourself time and your client’s money. What’s not to like?! I’ve got to run, but I hoped you enjoyed my little article on this interesting subject. If you did please take the time to click the like button at the top of this post or the tweet button. It would mean a lot to me if you would.

Thanks for taking the time to stop by and keep your eye out for the next article. Oh…in case you missed it I recently reviewed Sean Michael Andrew’s newest project called The Best Practices of Dave Elman. Check it out and see why it may be one of the best trainings released in a really long time.

As a hypnotist your job is basically that of a master persuader. You are persuading someone that their hand is glued to the wall, or that they are a non smoker. This is why, as hypnotists, it is essential we learn and study the psychology of persuasion. Unlike debating, where you attempt to reason with the rational mind, as hypnotists it is our goal to persuade the unconscious mind, a task which requires less rational argument than some may believe.

Naturally the fields of NLP and Ericksonian hypnosis contain a lot that we can draw on when studying how to influence the unconscious mind, but what a lot of hypnotherapists seem to overlook – to their detriment I might add – is the work of Dr Robert Cialdini. Drawing on studies such as the infamous Milgrim Experiment Cialdini founded his 6 principles of influence, all of which are very relevant to our work as hypnotists.

These principles are our core psychological drives, our mental buttons or triggers which, when pushed, can irresistibly lead us irrespective of rational justification.

These include:

• Authority
• Reciprocity
• Commitment and Consistency
• Scarcity
• Liking
• Social proof

From your marketing to your actual change work, studying these principles will pay off big time in your work as a hypnotist. Let’s talk through a basic clinical hypnotherapy set up to give you an idea of how easy it is to activate these principles in your own work. In your advertising you offer your clients a free consultation. This not only gets the phone ringing, but due to the principle of reciprocity this will also make your prospects far more likely to become paying clients.

On the phone you tell them that you are fully booked for the time they originally wanted, but you may just have an opening in one week’s time. Since you are showing your service to be in demand, the principle of scarcity makes it even more desirable than it was before. The client arrives at your office, and is shown into your very handsome therapy room where, with great confidence, you begin talking to them about hypnosis.

They see on your wall awards and recognition from other hypnotists. Perhaps your articles published in a hypnosis magazine, or an article about you in the local paper. Social proof says that what you do works. You gain rapport and get them liking you, and speak with such confidence that they find it natural to consider you an authority figure.

Already you have activated five important principles. Act uncertain and fail to gain rapport, and you’ve shot yourself in the foot.

Pretty basic so far, right?

Let’s step it up a notch.

Ask them ‘So, are you ready to make this change now!”

When then reply ‘Yes,’ ask ‘are you sure?’

When they again respond in the affirmative, they have made a commitment, one which basic human psychology and the principle of consistency shows they will not easily go back on. With all 6 principles utilized before they are even asked to close their eyes, you are well on your way to a knock out session! This is only a very basic example of how to use Cialdini’s principles of influence in your own work, but I hope you have found it useful. Cialdini’s work in the field of persuasion is ground breaking, and this post has barely scratched the surface.

The more you know about hypnotic persuasion, the more effective your hypnosis will be. To learn more about persuasion psychology and access some detailed articles, videos and other free resources, check out http://thepersuasionpsychology.com

Cheers, and I’ll see you soon,
Nathan Thomas

NOTE FROM JOSH: If you’re interesting in the subject of persuasion and influence one of the best books on the subject is The Persuasion Skills Black Book by Rintu Basu. This book is awesome and in very in depth. So if what Nathan talks about is interesting to you then I recommend you check out this book.

The Persuasion Skills Black Book

So if it doesn’t matter what approach is used, why should counselling and hypnotherapy be combined?

Milton Erickson, the founding father of Ericksonian hypnotherapy claimed that processing and change had to occur in the conscious and unconscious mind to really be effective. While counselling traditionally targets conscious experiences (such as thoughts, images and feelings we can easily access and communicate to others), hypnosis aims to influence the unconscious mind. So while the counselling process, involving respect, empathy and listening encourage conscious trust, hypnosis performed in a safe environment by a qualified and experienced practitioner helps to develop unconscious trust and rapport. Counselling and psychotherapy, whatever the approach, can help to make hypnosis and NLP more effective and vice versa, even though each attempts to address problems from a slightly different perspective.

Hypnotherapy usually focuses on changing behaviors, while counselling and psychotherapy more often help to promote self-understanding and self-acceptance. Together, breaking old habits and developing more adaptive behaviors and improving self-esteem and self-knowledge can create a much happier individual. Therefore, its impossible to really compare counselling and hypnotherapy. It would be like asking who’s better out of The Beatles and The Rolling Stones – they are both popular and well-known bands with much to offer.

Hypnotherapy can help psychologists, counsellors and psychotherapists who are wanting to help their client deepen their self-understanding and awareness of their transferences (seeing aspects of authority figures from childhood, such as parents and teachers, in perceived authority figures in adulthood) and projections (seeing disliked qualities of themselves in other people) through establishing a secure relationship with the unconscious. It can also be one of the fastest ways to develop rapport and trust with a therapist.

On a more individual level, I use dream work and analysis with my clients to help them identify more with their unconscious and to help them better understand the messages being sent from this part of the mind. Interventions promoting relaxation, such as light trances, meditative practices and Ericksonian hypnotherapy greatly accelerates this process. Another handy by product is increasing memory recall and self—confidence.

A further common difference between hypnotherapy and psychotherapy is the number of sessions required. Psychotherapy can literally go on for years, and in some schools such as traditional psychoanalysis, therapy is viewed as a life-long endeavour. Hypnotherapy can bring about noticeable changes in just a few sessions. Of course this is an average and will vary from person to person. While both approaches can be crucial to long-term healing such as in cases of unresolved or complex trauma, there are some issues such as nail-biting that hypnotherapy alone will be able to assist with.

So why in the world would anyone think abut having long term therapy that goes for months and in some cases years? In my view, NLP and hypnotherapy themselves are not able to address deep seated emotional and attachment disorders originating in early childhood. These issues are thought to arise due to parents not responding effectively to the needs of their infants and young children. This lack of response can range from the parents misinterpreting that their baby is hungry when the baby is cold, to parents overtly ignoring, neglecting and abusing their children. The relationship and responses we receive from our parents in the earliest years of our life go on to form the templates we use that guides our expectations of what we will receive from others in all sorts of relationships including platonic, professional and intimate. Almost everyone who seeks psychotherapy have an insecure attachment style which can either be avoidant (lots of conscious mind activity, but rarely any emotional or feeling states), anxious ambivalent (flooded with and guided by emotional feelings and states with less conscious mind activity) and disorganised (who are incredibly sensitive to threats, inherently mistrusting and find it very difficult to feel safe).

Regardless if the presenting complaint is anxiety, pain, depression, addiction, OCD, trauma or relationship problems, there will always be an attachment disorder exacerbating the emotional torment. All of these problems unconsciously have one purpose: to avoid feelings. That is why “getting rid of a behavior”, for example quitting smoking or giving up alcohol is not enough. While the behavior may be gone, the underlying motivation for the behaviour lingers and eventually crops up again if the deeper reasons are not acknowledged, processed and understood for what they really are and what they represent. This is explains why I see so many people who have “tried so much hypnotherapy and NLP and CBT before”. I reassure them that there is a very valuable place for hypnotherapy within the counselling relationship but it is not a quick fix.

Willing people work courageously to face their inner conflicts and resolve them in time. This develops an authentic self, a self which is well integrated, congruent and fully aware of all it’s aspects. In effect, this process transforms and insecure attachment into a secure one, helping to shield against depression, anxiety, stress and traumatic feelings.

In my view true therapeutic work comes from changing an attachment pattern to a secure attachment complex. With a safe enough therapeutic alliance and weekly sessions this can be possible. A key pillar of this process in the ability of the therapist to remain non-judgemental, to offer ongoing acceptance and respect regardless of what the client discloses. With hypnotherapy and self-hypnosis the client can learn how to do this for themselves by accepting what they experience non-judgementally. This takes regular practice of around two years for the plasticity of the brain to change and an adaptive attachment style formed. This does require a commitment of time and money, however the life waiting for you at the end of the rainbow is one you can’t imagine at this point.

Melbourne Hypnotherapist and Counsellor Adam Szmerling has been practicing since 1996. He has completed and Advanced Diploma of Clinical Hypnotherapy, an undergraduate degree in counselling and postgraduate studies in counselling and psychotherapy. He is a Master Practitioner of NLP and takes a Mindfulness and Attachment Therapy approach to counselling, integrating clinical hypnotherapy, NLP, mindfulness, psychodynamic and experiential approaches to best support the needs of each individual client.

http://www.baysidepsychotherapy.com.au/Counselling_and_Psychotherapy.php
http://www.baysidepsychotherapy.com.au/Hypnotherapy_and_NLP.php
http://www.baysidepsychotherapy.com.au/

As many of my readers know about a month or two ago my good friend and guest writer here at Whatsonmybrain.com put together an amazing deal where he was pretty much giving away the bank.

I wrote a post on it entitled “Jamie Smart Is Going Nuts Again‘ because the offer he was giving away was just so insane. He basically gave away his entire NLP Collection!

Well, due to the holidays Jamie Smart has decided to once again go crazy and offer an even better deal then last time, if that’s possible.  He is basically taking a one huge box (look to your right) and stuffing it with everything you can think of such as Belief Change, Hypnosis and NLP Products.

The image to the right shows you just a few of the products he is putting in the big box. Think about it, imagine how much stuff can fit in a one huge box?

The last time I told all of my readers about Jamie’s special offer I got tons of wonderful e-mails thanking me for letting them know about the special sale. I do my best to keep my readers informed when good deals like this come down the pipeline.

UPDATE: This offer has expired, but Jamie Smart has decided to keep the holiday spirit going with ANOTHER GREAT DEAL! Click the links below to learn more about this new offer or just click play on the video below to listen to Jamie tell you about his new special.

Check Out This Other Great Christmas Deal To Good To Pass Up!

Jamie Smart has always been a good friend to me and he has a big heart. So click the link below and discover whats in the box?

Click Here To Discover What Jamie Smart Is Up To Now For The Holiday

In this article we’re going to look at my favourite conversational hypnosis technique. As you begin to use this powerful approach more and more intentionally, you’ll be amazed at how positively people will respond to you.

You may already be aware that over the past few months, I’ve spent days in the editing suite, poring over the footage from our “Secrets of Hypnosis” training. There was 8 hours of training, & 3 cameras worth of footage, so it was the longest time I’ve ever spent watching myself & paying attention to how the people I’m working with (including the “audience”) respond to me.

I don’t know if you’ve ever seen yourself talking or presenting to people on video before, but one of the things that happens as you relax & watch yourself from a variety of angles & perspectives is this: you start to become very aware of how people respond to what you say & do, very aware of the subtle (& not-so-subtle) shifts that give you clues to how your messages are being received.

For example: at one point in the programme, I want to “disarm” any scepticism people have about hypnosis (on the film, you can see one of the members of the group with his arms crossed in a classic “sceptical” posture), so I told a story – I said:

“I was at the gym the other day, & I was talking to a woman who was studying psychology, & when I told her I was involved with NLP, she made a face. So I said ‘I sense that you’ve got some reservations about it.” She explained that she was somewhat sceptical…

It reminds me of the time a man was sent to me by his boss for coaching. We met, & after I introduced myself, he said (with classic sceptical pose) “I’m usually pretty sceptical about this sort of thing”.

“Usually?” I responded.

“Well, you come very highly recommended”, he replied.

I said, “Well you should be sceptical.”

He looked puzzled. “Why?” he asked.

I explained, “Until you’ve experienced just how powerful this stuff can be in your own life, why would you have any reason to be anything else?”

He relaxed visibly, uncrossed his arms, & engaged fully with our coaching session.

(By the way, crossed arms don’t “mean” someone is sceptical – sometimes they just feel comfortable with them crossed, but it can be a useful clue when combined with other information).

The power of stories

By now, you’ve probably guessed that my favourite conversational hypnosis technique is stories.

As human beings, the ability to tell & listen to stories is an evolutionary development (remember, until a few hundred years ago, there was no printing press – stories were pretty much the only way to pass on the wisdom of the tribe from one generation to the next).

When we listen to stories, we do a “me too” – we go inside our own experience to find examples to help make sense of the story we’re hearing.

This is a very hypnotic experience.

This is why when you tell someone a story, they’ll tell you about something similar that happened to them.

1) Decide to see yourself as a storyteller & start developing your skills.

Stories are such a powerful for skill for conversational hypnosis, because as soon as you start telling one, the effect on your listeners is powerful:

• They age regress – we all got told stories as children, & there are lots of positive anchors associated with them for most people.

• They relax & take off their “armour” – after all, it’s just a story!

• They do a “me too”, & start finding or creating references for what you’re telling them about.

Remember, people will only do something once they’ve imagined doing it.

As I came to the end of my story about the sceptical man I was coaching, I watched with a deep sense of satisfaction as the man in the audience whose arms were crossed suddenly relaxed, changed his posture & uncrossed his arms.

He’d gone inside his own experience to make sense of the sceptic story, & created a reference for himself of moving from scepticism, to curiosity, to being fully engaged. And of course, once he imagined it, he started to do it.

When I saw this piece of footage, I told Dave (the editor) “You have to get this on the DVD“, so he used his technical wizardry to do a shot within shot so you can see the audience responses as you’re watching me deliver the training.

2) Go back to the beginning of this tip & highlight all the different stories I’ve told. Ask yourself “What is he trying to accomplish with this story?”

Part of how I got good at using stories to influence people was by listening to how other people who got great results were doing it. I said to myself “You can become a master storyteller” then started to watch, listen & practice.

3) Next time you’re having a conversation with someone, ask yourself “What is one of the stories I could tell them now to help them feel good?” Then tell the story, & notice the response you get.

Noticing the responses you get is key. The visual component is an essential aspect of hypnosis (conversational or otherwise), because this is how you notice what response you’re getting.

• The best hypnotherapists

• Great public speakers

• Highly paid consultants

• Strong, charismatic leaders

• The most effective managers

• The funniest comedians

• Great coaches

What do all these people have in common? They notice the response they’re getting, & alter what they’re doing & saying accordingly.

To your success!

Your friend,
Jamie Smart

Jamie Smart
CEO
jamie.smart@saladltd.co.uk

Jamie Smart is one of the UK’s finest NLP trainers, an experienced hypnotist, & CEO of Salad. Salad is one of the world’s leading source of training & products for developing NLP, influence & hypnosis skills. He believes that people are capable of far more than they think they are, and that changing your beliefs and attitudes is the fastest way to attract the success and fulfilment you desire.

Jamie is passionate about people, NLP, hypnosis, happiness and language, and is the creator of Ericksonian Hypnosis Cards, NLP Coaching Cards, and Irresistible Influence Cards, the fastest way there is to learn the language of NLP. His weekly NLP & hypnosis newsletters are read by over 30,000 hypnotherapists, coaches, managers, therapists and personal development enthusiasts worldwide. Check out more from Jamie at www.saladltd.co.uk and www.mynlpresources.com

Better Coaching with Hypnosis

In this article, I’m going to reveal how you can make hypnosis an integral part of the coaching process & why that’s a good idea. I’ve come out of ‘corporate retirement’ this week to do a couple of days of executive coaching for an old friend of mine. When I do this sort of work, I tend to do “breakthrough” sessions, where I’ll spend a few hours coaching someone, help them make some big changes, then maybe not see them again for months or even years.

As you can imagine, when you’ve got a small amount of time to make some big changes, you use whatever is going to make the largest difference. So one of the things I tend to use is hypnosis.

“But hypnosis isn’t coaching!” I hear the coaching purists say. But I disagree. In fact, I’ll make a provocative statement.

All coaches use hypnosis!

That’s right! All coaches use hypnosis. Think about it:

• Every word you say to someone causes them to make mental images & other representations.

• When you ask someone a deep question, it contains presuppositions that cause them to engage unconscious processes.

• When you get into rapport with someone, you start leading each others states

• When you get people to imagine some desired future even or circumstances, you’re getting them to hallucinate (& maybe even re-orienting them in time).

All of the above are part of coaching, so coaching is a hypnotic process. So the question isn’t “Is it OK to use hypnosis in coaching?” You’re already a hypnotist, whether you like it or not. The real question is “How can I use hypnotic processes even more intentionally & effectively as part of my coaching process?”

Here are a few tips:

1) Recognise the hypnotic nature of language

If your coaching process involves talking with people, then you’re doing hypnosis. Once you recognise this fact, then you can start to be more intentional about how you use language to guide people’s attention in various ways.

2) Identify & utilise your existing hypnotic opportunities

When my co-trainer, Peter Freeth, is coaching someone, one of the first things he’ll say is something along the lines of “The fact that you’ve come here today means you’ve already done 80% of the work towards making this change. You’ve identified a change you want to make, you’ve found someone to work with, you’ve scheduled a session & you’ve shown up. And as a result, you’re going to be able to make the changes you want to quickly & easily.”

Look at what Peter says again. If you deliver it congruently, it’s a powerful piece of hypnosis. It uses “A means B” logic to frame the session, paces the person’s experience, then uses “X causes Y” logic to create a powerful expectation of success.

There are a number of opportunities within every coaching session that are going to be the same every time – think about it:

• Doing the initial deal & scheduling your first session
• Greeting the client
• Finding out what they want to accomplish
• Saying goodbye
• etc

Each of these is a ‘hypnotic opportunity’. You can create “hypnotic accelerators” (like Peter’s one) to massively increase the power & effectiveness of your coaching sessions, & you can use the same ones every time if you want to.

3) Learn the principles of hypnotic communication

I believe that learning hypnosis is one of the most powerful ways of improving your communication skills. Why? Because when you’re doing hypnosis, you have to pay particular attention to:

• The other person
• Your communication goals
• The language you’re using

Language is powerful, & language is hypnotic. Learning hypnosis is one of the most powerful ways to get better coaching skills to help your clients with.

To sign up to receive my free hypnosis language patterns please go to http://www.saladltd.co.uk/hypnosis_course_free_signup.htm

Have a great week

Best wishes

Your Friend
Jamie Smart

Jamie Smart
director of training
jamie.smart@saladltd.co.uk

Jamie Smart is one of the UK’s finest NLP trainers, an experienced hypnotist, & CEO of Salad. Salad is one of the world’s leading source of training & products for developing NLP, influence & hypnosis skills. He believes that people are capable of far more than they think they are, and that changing your beliefs and attitudes is the fastest way to attract the success and fulfilment you desire.

Jamie is passionate about people, NLP, hypnosis, happiness and language, and is the creator of Ericksonian Hypnosis Cards, NLP Coaching Cards, and Irresistible Influence Cards, the fastest way there is to learn the language of NLP. His weekly NLP & hypnosis newsletters are read by over 30,000 hypnotherapists, coaches, managers, therapists and personal development enthusiasts worldwide. Check out more from Jamie at www.saladltd.co.uk and www.mynlpresources.com